Happy 1st Birthday Lily Girl!

Despite my best efforts to stop it from happening, my Lily girl turned 1. I attempted to make a giant cupcake for her birthday cake. I learned 2 things: I suck at baking cakes and my cupcake did not look like the one on the box. I've already decided that I want to take a class to learn how to decorate cakes before her next party. I will get good at this! The funny thing was that Lily wouldn't even touch her cake. She cried when we put a little icing in her mouth for her to eat. She loved the candle, but no thanks to cake.
When did my baby grow up to be a cute little toddler? Don't you love her outfit? I found it online at diapers.com and I used her diaper points to buy it for free!!! It was perfect for my little stylish 1 year old. I made these special cupcakes for our guests. I decided that we would only invite family and close friends to her 1st birthday party. Something small and special for our little 1 year old, and it was perfect.

My sister even flew in from Texas to celebrate with us! My Aunt CeCe and Uncle Terry even came over from Oregon to celebrate with us. What a lovely surprise! As you can tell the Lily and her new cousin Madison were having so much fun. Ha Ha Ha.

Today wasn't an easy day for me. I think that's why it took me so long to post this. I seriously can't believe that I have a 1 year old. Time went so fast....she is still my baby, but she isn't a baby anymore. She's not even taking bottles anymore. She takes big girl sippy cups. She is now fitting in to size 18 months, walking around, and talking jibberish. Can't she be my baby forever? As our family sang happy birthday, I sobbed like you wouldn't believe.....the ugly cry and everything. Isn't it a good thing that my baby is growing up to be a happy, healthy, and amazing little girl? You would think so....but nope, I am not okay with this. Lily is my baby and she always will be. I understand how my mom feels now. Its so weird how many things I am learning about being a mom, how it comes naturally, how I fear everything will happen to Lily and how I will protect her from it all. A part of me feels guilty for missing so much of her first year because I had to work.....or because I rushed it to get things done. I realize now that I am doing the best that I can do and that I am a great mommy to her. I will do anything for her, forever and always.

Happy Birthday Lily baby.....you have brought so much joy to our lives and I love every moment I spend with you. You are the love of my life (plus your daddy and your sissy)